Not the drawing, the drawing is pretty good actually. The problem is my colossal lack to bring peace into all aspects of my life. The reptilian brain wins so easily when it is unchecked. When you feel that surge, what do you do with it. Our brains are so amazingly fast except when we are reliving a tried and true path. The path we accept because we saw it played out in our parents or our role models, and we adopt it as our own.

Then…you run into a brick wall. One that you have created yourself. One that you must take ownership of. What destroys a man are his choices, some are small and accumulate over time, others are large and demonstrative. But, both seek our ruin.

Yesterday, I spoke of mindfulness, and today with humility I relate my failure to do so. Disregarding the specifics, it seems suffice to say that the thing I wish to do I don’t do, and the thing that I don’t want to do…I do. Mindfulness of all my choices (and it really is a choice) is what is lacking when we use our visceral or reptilian brain. How can I bring light and peace, when you create dis-ease and tumult?

Being peaceful is so damned difficult…and so damned easy. Why then do we make it so hard for ourselves and others around us? Why then must I commit colossal failures to RE-LEARN a lesson I’ve learned too many times before? What’s the phrase? “The way to Hell is paved with good intentions.”

Sorrow.

Advertisements